We all need that God soil in our life, that soil that helps us rise up out of our shame and heartache and blossom into all He has planted us for!
I love synthetic flowers. Honestly, I love them because they never die. Flowers in general remind me that when placed in the right soil they can truly flourish. We all need that God soil in our life. That soil that helps us rise up out of our shame and heartache and blossom into all He has planted us for!
Warning ⚠️ this post could be triggering!
I wrote the poem that follows this 13 plus years ago after reaching an ultimate low in life. I was feeling defeated, lost, worthless, confused, exhausted but mostly unaware of my purpose. I was depressed, suffering from an eating disorder and marking my skin with blades. The anxiety I felt was consuming and paralyzing. I felt completely useless. I felt invisible in life. It was during this time I made the decision to end my life. I was done! Long story short I was taken to the hospital where I could be helped. It was during this time that I was forced to come to terms with the anxiety and depression that I felt was consuming me. I could begin to hear God speak to me so clearly. I was alone but safe in my hospital room, hiding under the sheets, crying and writing what I heard God speak. I didn’t even know God wanted to speak to someone like me. Honestly, at the time I didn’t understand the meaning in His words. They made no sense but I wrote! Looking back, I stand in awe of where God brought me from. I can see how His words in those painful moments were a glimpse of all the beauty that awaited even when I couldn’t see or feel it in that moment. I still fight anxiety. I still find myself depressed at times. However, with help I have learned how to handle my anxiety and depression in a healthy way. I can see how in my darkest hour God was still willing to pick me out of the seed packet and place me in the perfect spot to truly flourish in all He created me for. I don’t think the following words were just for me. I believe they were meant to be shared all along! There are many of you who are in a storm of your own. Your storm might look different. God wants to speak to you. Yes YOU! You who sit in your mess, covered in the sin of the world, angry at Him, misjudged by others, confused from the report from the doctor, scared of what tomorrow brings, unsure if you want to live another minute, filled with an overwhelming amount of anxiety, grief and depression! He wants to speak to your heart and fill it with a crazy amount of peace. A peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
A note from God!
When you’re lost within confusion and held down by sorrow and doubt.
When you’re drowning in a river of heartache just remember I’ll be there to lead you out.
Soon the waters will hear my voice, the wind will calm at the sound of my call. The world will at once stand still allowing you to stand in awe.
You will climb the highest mountains, swim through the toughest waves.
You will find yourself in my presence, surrounded by my love, filled with my grace!
Do not run with every fear!
Do not drown in all your tears!
Do not be held down by sorrow and doubt!
I am still here!
Just call on my name.
I will lead you out!
If you think someone might be considering suicide, take the first step and #BeThe1To ask. Ask directly, “Are you thinking about killing yourself?”
Find out how you can save a life at
If you are struggling call the lifeline at
1 800 273 TALK (8255)
THERE IS NO SHAME IN ASKING AND RECEIVING HELP!
Always remember that you are a beautiful flower planted by Jesus.