When I was a little girl we were at my Aunt Shannon and Uncle Harold’s house. All the kids were playing in the backyard. I remember it was a rainy day because the backyard was muddy and wet and the sun was hidden away. I had a baby doll and wasn’t planning to share. Someone ratted me out and Uncle Harold came out and told me that if I didn’t want to share my doll that I needed to bring her in the house where she could be safe. I was so annoyed and mad! I know now that he was only trying to help me. How dare he tell me that I have to share my special doll. To think he wants me to bring my doll inside and leave her… alone… by herself? What?!?! That’s crazy! I was angry. I complied though because outside that moment he was a cool uncle. My doll was nothing like the American Girl doll Ellie got for her 5th birthday but she was special and she held my 7 year old heart. Years later at 35 I completely understand. I even tell my kids the same thing. If you have something you don’t want to share, put it away while you are playing with friends. My cousins and I had so much fun and we didn’t have the fight over the doll getting in the way. We found something we could all enjoy together. When I went home, I had my doll and I learned that life doesn’t always make sense in the moment.

Oftentimes, God guides us in a certain direction and like a 7 year old little girl we fight it.

Situations we might fight God on: 

1. A closed door. 

2. The call to forgiveness. 

3. A major life change. 

4. A delayed promise. 

5. A senseless loss.

We fight the closed door. We argue why we have the right not to forgive. We question a major life change like a big move. We grow impatient waiting on His promise. We mourn a loss that makes no sense. 

We get angry. Who is He to tell me that I’m not ready for that promotion? How dare he ask me to be patient, wait on Him, trust or forgive. It doesn’t make sense at the moment. Just like it didn’t make sense at 7 why I had to put the doll away if I didn’t want to share. Some things that God asks us to do don’t make sense at the moment but later we will understand. Today we might not understand the path we are on, but tomorrow when we are walking through another season His leading will reveal what we couldn’t see when we complied in faith.

I was telling Ellie how proud of her we are. She works so hard, her teacher says she’s a great friend who shows love to everyone. I’ve noticed you show compassion to those who struggle.

Ellie responded:

I always pay attention to the teacher even when there are distractions around me.

Me: what kind of distractions?

Ellie: I don’t know I’m paying attention to the teacher, remember?

😂

What a reminder for all of us to stay focused on Jesus and not the distractions around. Jessie Rayos ❤️

Jay brought me his broken Jesus toy early this morning. He wanted me to fix it and I tried but I couldn’t seem to put it back together. I told Jay “I’m sorry. I can’t fix it.” He lowered his head and said “oooookkkkkaaayyyyyy” in the most sad voice.

Let’s keep this short and simple! Aren’t you thankful that God doesn’t look at you and say “sorry I can’t fix you”? When we go to God broken and in pieces, our willingness to surrender to Him allows Him to put us back together. Not only will He put us back together but He will have mercy on us returning more then what we lost. Even if your mistakes led to your brokenness, if you allow Him, God will restore you.

“Then the Lord your God will restore your fortunes. He will have mercy on you and gather you back from all the nations where he has scattered you. Even though you are banished to the ends of the earth, the Lord your God will gather you from there and bring you back again. The Lord your God will return you to the land that belonged to your ancestors, and you will possess that land again. Then he will make you even more prosperous and numerous than your ancestors!”
Deuteronomy 30:3-5 nlt

We delivered the valentine caterpillars for valentines to a local nursing home. Both kids did great.

Highlights:

One nice gentleman man responded “but you don’t even know me?!?! (He was in tears)

One nice man responded “what the &$)$ am I suppose to do with this?!?! 😂 We love him and we learned that not everyone is able to receive a gift well.

Jay ran around the entire time creating tons of positive energy. One nice lady asked to keep him.

Jay waved at residents, held their hands, played the piano and happily gave away tons of caterpillars.

Ellie says her favorite resident was all of them. “They must have been so happy to make a new friend mom!”

It is always refreshing to spend time with the residents at the nursing home. ❤️

We delivered the valentine caterpillars for valentines to a local nursing home. Both kids did great.

Highlights:

One nice gentleman man responded “but you don’t even know me?!?! (He was in tears)

One nice man responded “what the &$)$ am I suppose to do with this?!?! 😂 We love him and we learned that not everyone is able to receive a gift well.

Jay ran around the entire time creating tons of positive energy. One nice lady asked to keep him.

Jay waved at residents, held their hands, played the piano and happily gave away tons of caterpillars.

Ellie says her favorite resident was all of them. “They must have been so happy to make a new friend mom!”

It is always refreshing to spend time with the residents at the nursing home. ❤️

Ellie is a PRO on skates! She never takes them off and if we weren’t worried about her knocking her brother on the head in the middle of the night, she’d sleep in them. She falls alot but she always gets back up. We encourage Ellie to always get back up and finish strong no matter how many times she falls. There are some falls when she needs us to take her by the hand and help her up off the ground. Some falls require that she takes a break, rest or heal. In other moments we hold her hand as she skates to help prevent a fall. We never tell her she fell too hard, fell one too many times or took a fall too big to fix. We say “You will get back up. You will Finish strong!”

Is God saying this to each of us? Get back up. Finish strong.

“Though I have fallen I will rise though I sit in darkness the lord will be my light.” Micah 7:8

I keep thinking about the box of crayons I was recently given. They are used and broken and passed down because the individual who gave them to me knows I could use them for something crafty. It won’t be long until I find a way to repurpose them. I think of the broken crayons now in my hands and my heart is suddenly filled with peace that I am like a broken crayon in the hands of God.

If I’m being truthful, my spirit is broken. My heart feels like it is drowning. I hurt in ways I never knew I could. My body aches physically from the emotional trauma this past year has brought our family. Life can be so cruel. It’s always changing. However, God is always the same. He never changes. He always has a plan. He always loves us. His grace and compassion has been so alive through this season and He is always enough. I’m reminded that no matter how much pain I experience this side of heaven, it will have no weight compared to the weight of Gods love for me.

I aim to be real with y’all. I don’t ever want my readers to think I’ve got it all together. I don’t want you to think for a second that every season I walk through is sunny. I don’t want you to feel alone in your own pain. I’m walking through a painful season currently and while I choose not to share the details at the moment I know I’m not alone in my pain either.

As we sit in His presence broken, our faith cannot fail. Our faith must remain steady and our eyes and hearts looking to Him. He is working on His way to repurpose the broken pieces of our hearts. We only need to trust them in His hands.

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalms 34:18

Crowns in Heaven

When I was a little girl my mom used to tell me that I was earning crowns in heaven for being obedient and serving others. Honestly I just thought it was my moms way of tricking me into doing as she said. However, there is some truth to what she once told me. 

Several years ago, my dad was crowned King at his nursing home valentines party. He was thrilled. So thrilled that he made sure to walk back and forth with his hands in the air, a big smile that I can only imagine was plastered on his face as he claimed his victory. The birthday girl was crowned his queen and let me tell you how that boosted his ego even more. 

I don’t know about you, but like my dad  I love to receive a reward. I like when others notice my hard work. I enjoy being told good job Or well done. I’m working on this as it can sometimes be a flaw. Being given a crown is a reward we could receive in heaven. 

Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. Revelation 5:12

“Behold, I am coming soon, bringing my recompense with me, to repay each one for what he has done. Revelation 22:12 

I am coming soon. Hold fast what you have, so that no one may seize your crown. Revelation 3:11

The vision Jesus gave John is partly found in Revelation 4:10-11. It is here that we read “the twenty-four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne and worship him who lives for ever and ever. They lay their crowns before the throne and say: ‘You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.’”

Jesus promised various rewards for those who serve Him faithfully on earth (Matthew 5:12; 1 Corinthians 3:14; Revelation 22:12). Crowns are among some of these rewards. (James 1:12; 1 Peter 5:4; Revelation 3:11). Could these be the crowns John saw the elders lay at the feet of Jesus? 

I like to believe so. What an opportunity. We have the opportunity to serve Jesus in such a way on earth that when we get to heaven we can throw crowns at His feet. In heaven we will have the opportunity to boast about Jesus. To say “it is because of Jesus!” I aim to live my life on earth in such a way that I can fill the feet of Jesus with thousands of crowns.

Ellie was emotionally drained recently. I casually pulled out a craft. She always starts talking when we are doing some sort of project. “Mom, you always know what I need to feel better!” That was a good feeling mom moment. I explained to her that I know her well. I know what she likes and doesn’t like and what she needs and doesn’t need. Most of the time I get it right, but sometimes I get it wrong.

Jesus never gets it wrong. When he shows up he always does so with just what we need. He’s always on time. He shows up with what he knows will benefit us. He doesn’t show up in our time, with our desires or our agenda. He shows up in His time, in His way with what He knows will put us in the perfect will of God. It might not make sense in the moment. It might be really difficult. It might take longer then you would like but what He has for you is better then anything you could ever plan on your own. If we let Him, He can do “exceedingly more then we could ever hope or imagine.” Ephesians 3:20

Remember this verse when you are in a season of waiting. Remember this when you have your own agenda and idea of what should happen next. Remember these words when you have your own schedule. When you want to move before he has said go, remember He can be trusted. Remember that He will show up and when He does it will be with just what you need. It will be right.

“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” Psalms 27:14

Ellie was emotionally drained recently. I casually pulled out a craft. She always starts talking when we are doing some sort of project. “Mom, you always know what I need to feel better!” That was a good feeling mom moment. I explained to her that I know her well. I know what she likes and doesn’t like and what she needs and doesn’t need. Most of the time I get it right, but sometimes I get it wrong.

Jesus never gets it wrong. When he shows up he always does so with just what we need. He’s always on time. He shows up with what he knows will benefit us. He doesn’t show up in our time, with our desires or our agenda. He shows up in His time, in His way with what He knows will put us in the perfect will of God. It might not make sense in the moment. It might be really difficult. It might take longer then you would like but what He has for you is better then anything you could ever plan on your own. If we let Him, He can do “exceedingly more then we could ever hope or imagine.” Ephesians 3:20

Remember this verse when you are in a season of waiting. Remember this when you have your own agenda and idea of what should happen next. Remember these words when you have your own schedule. When you want to move before he has said go, remember He can be trusted. Remember that He will show up and when He does it will be with just what you need. It will be right.

“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” Psalms 27:14